Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
