he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
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