Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
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