I wanna bring you to show and tell
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
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