YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
