arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
