apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
