What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
