He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
Randomize
