Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
Randomize