The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
