that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
