i was born a porn star she said
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Randomize
