Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
