We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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