Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
