How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Randomize
