Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Randomize
