Ambien. No doubt about it.
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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