I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
