these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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