This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
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