Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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