Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
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