i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
