i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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