dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
