nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
