she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize