He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
You were trust falling into bushes
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize
