Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Randomize
