When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
