you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Randomize
