Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize
