You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
