Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
