Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I need to sanitize my soul.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Randomize
