Dual....:-)
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Randomize