When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize