i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
Randomize
