We're facebook friends in real life
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
