we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
Your message has been received by an unknown user. Picture verification required.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
