I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
