The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Randomize
