And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Randomize