I wish I could teleport
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I want to fling myself into the sun
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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