So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
