Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize