How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
