I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize
