it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I am never drinking with the goths again.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Randomize
