I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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